January 1st - traditional time to make changes...

okay - so its the first resolutions are made to be broken? No resolutions from me, just a goddamm determination to get things done this year.
For me.
Sort out the diet - eat as close to home as possible, lose the sweet tooth, nothing with more than 5 ingredients in it.
Choose a 'look' - 34 really is too old to want to be emo, but I 'm not ready to embrace full on old biker chick yet. maybe i should pick a signature colour? or accessory - i could be the 'scarf' girl or 'the one with the earrings' ...nah.
Quit swearing - wee boy will soon be imitating - have managed to produce two awesome and polite boys so far, need that trend to continue.
For them.
They need to man up and learn to pitch in - I need to learn not to do everything for them, and learn to delegate a bit more.
I need to enhance my calm.

For all.

I'm taking tomorrow as a reset day - clearing out the kitchen cupboards, getting in ingredients and shopping that will make changing a bit easier. I also have to visit with mother...where she will make thinly veiled comments about my life of excess and how she's never been my size - she has chosen to channel her addictive gene towards tobacco and alcohol rather than food.

I often wonder if I smoked would I be thin? and 30 is a stupid age to start...

Would I rather be fat and normal looking - or thin and pot ugly?
Would I rather live to 100 as a fatty, or to 50 thin?
Rich and fat, or poor and thin?

The answer sadly to all these is thin, I'd rather be thin and ugly and poor and sickly, than what I am now...which is a really sad state of affairs. Yet I keep stuffing my face.

lets make 2011 the year that rocks!